The Friend ★★½

Iris (Naomi Watts) has had a long-standing relationship with Walter Meredith (Bill Murray) and his sudden death by suicide has left her shocked. He had been her college writing professor, they had a one-off sexual encounter, and now aside from just being friends, he has served as a mentor for her writing career. It is enough for her to have to grapple with the grief she feels while still editing a book of his correspondence – months before his suicide, he asked Iris and his daughter Val (Sarah Pidgeon) to work on this for him – but now, she discovers one more surprise from her old colleague. After the funeral, Iris is called to meet with his third wife, Barbara (Noma Dumezweni), where Iris is told that Walter had made it clear: he wanted Iris to take his beloved Great Dane, Apollo, into her care. As she lives in a rent-controlled apartment in an apartment complex that forbids pets, this request initially throws her life into more chaos.

Iris does not want to be evicted, as she could not afford another apartment in New York City. It was also her late father’s apartment, so there is a sentimental tie to the place. It is also small, complicated by having a dog the size of a Great Dane. She feels guilty leaving Apollo in a cramped kennel and, worse, no shelters have any space for a Great Dane. As she cares for the dog and deals with the scornful eye of her building’s superintendent, Iris quickly discovers that Apollo is grieving, too. Barbara had alerted her to his behavior in refusing to leave the door, always awaiting Walter’s never-to-come return and now Iris sees Apollo find comfort in being read to (as the avid writer and reader Walter must have done) and in laying on an old shirt that Walter had worn. These two grieving souls may be in a difficult living situation and separated by being different species with different ways of expressing themselves, but both are as lost as one another. Apollo no longer has his master. Iris no longer has her friend, mentor, and confidant.

“What will happen to the dog?” This is a common refrain in writer and director duo Scott McGehee and David Siegel’s The Friend. Initially it takes on the literal meaning of who will care for him as Iris takes it on, while still trying to find alternatives. None of them feel quite right and, over time, she becomes attached to Apollo. As the film reveals itself further, moving beyond grief for Walter and instead moving towards being more of an ode to Apollo and dogs in general, the question becomes a bit more existential as Iris, in narration, muses on how often animals in stories die or suffer even if they survive. In a way, Apollo suffers as a Great Dane with a shorter lifespan than most dog breeds, already having arthritis in his hips by age 5 or 6. As the months go by and the seasons change, Iris and the viewer are both keenly aware of Apollo’s already slowing speed and his growing nearness to his own death. 

Yet, The Friend uses Apollo not as just another source of loss, but as a different angle on companionship. He becomes a close emotional resource for Iris with the two sharing in their mourning and learning to cope without Walter together. As she narrates and writes a story all about this situation and the bond she has with this dog, Apollo becomes a symbol of the act of love in seeing a loved one age and not looking away, the pain in not having been able to share even more time with them before they aged, and preemptively mourning them before they are even gone. What will happen to the dog? In time, it will die. It does not in The Friend, but Iris will be there when Apollo does. It was something she could do for her father and now for this Great Dane. It was not something she could do for Walter, a moment and reality she struggles to come to terms with.

The Friend is quite moving and, especially as Iris breaks down with a therapist, a fantastic showcase for Naomi Watts. She is terrific throughout, but really nails this scene where the anguish that Iris had kept pinned down finally comes to the surface. Wrestling with her feelings of anger, grief, and confusion, all while dipping back into the pain of the death of her father, Iris is in an emotionally turbulent time and one that Watts expresses with grace and depth. The Friend excels in feeling especially lived in – the original author Sigrid Nunez based the story on her own life and the world she and her writer friends inhabited – with Watts exuding this quality. Apollo, too, is given great authenticity by the dog Bing. So expressive, naturally funny, and authentic in its expressions of emotional pain, Bing gives a remarkably well-rounded performance that comes to exemplify many of The Friend’s ideas on loss and friendship. Though Apollo may be a dog, his feelings come with the same depth as Iris’s and Bing captures every bit of that sense of heartache, longing, and confusion.

The Friend does struggle when it comes to adapting its source material. As with many adaptations of novels, it can get too bogged down in details and narration. The film is at its best in the moment, finding its characters expressing feelings and bonds. As the film progresses, it becomes increasingly reliant on narration from Iris’s new novel and these feelings are comparatively more hollow and over-explained. Connected to this is the film’s overly long running time. As the narrative shifts from just exploring Iris’s life after Walter’s death to her growing bond with Apollo, months and years begin to pass. The Friend is one of those films that feels like it has multiple endings, all building up to what is ultimately an opportunity to just bait whether or not Apollo dies, passing up far more poignant and suitable finales that could have spared it this eye-rolling tension and still ended it on a poignant note.

Writers and directors Scott McGehee and David Siegel find plenty of emotion and power in the cozy literary world of New York City. The Friend is charming and enjoyable, finding emotional resonance in exploring the friendship between humans and dogs, as well as the tricky emotional minefield of bereavement. It is further bolstered by Naomi Watts’ great performance and the impressive canine acting of Bing. The Friend comes with its share of flaws in condensing its novel origins into a cinematic endeavor, but there is warmth in The Friend that carries it through as an overall rewarding experience even if it overstays its welcome.